News

When you need to give bad news, especially to someone in a position of authority, you will probably have some anxiety, if not outright fear and maybe even terror. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be human! Here’s the thing though, the person you are about to share this bad news with is also a human being, with all of the same fears and anxieties that you have. More than likely, they will need to share your news with their important stakeholders, which will probably not be good for them.

What most people do in this moment is focus entirely on themselves — rehearsing their explanation, defending their position, managing their own anxiety. That’s understandable, but it’s exactly backwards. The moment you shift your focus from your own discomfort to theirs, everything changes.

Before you do anything else, you must convey a sense of empathy to your recipient about the situation you are putting them in. “I understand this creates a problem, not just for me but for you too, and I am deeply sorry about that.” This isn’t a script — it’s a mindset. You’re signalling that you understand the ripple effects of your news, that you’ve thought beyond yourself, and that you’re a partner in solving the problem rather than just the source of it.

You also need to come prepared. Bad news delivered without a plan is just a burden transfer. Wherever possible, arrive with your assessment of the situation, what you’ve already done to contain it, and your recommended path forward. This doesn’t mean having all the answers — it means demonstrating that you’re taking responsibility.

You must create emotional equilibrium with the recipient right off the bat. Otherwise, you will have fear meeting fear, and that will not end well for you — particularly if the other person has the positional power. The goal isn’t to eliminate the tension; some tension is appropriate when something has gone wrong. The goal is to ensure the conversation stays productive rather than defensive. Empathy and preparation are the two things that make that possible.

INSPIRATION FROM OTHERS

“The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.” – James A. Garfield
“Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” – Helen Keller

QUESTIONS TO REFLECT ON

• What will this news mean for the person you’re speaking to — and for their stakeholders?
• Are you coming with a plan, or just a problem?
• How can you pre-empt and address their likely emotions to keep the conversation productive?

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